The Joy of Carpetbagging

Our Mayor for Life, King Francis the Eternal, has drawn a line in the sand.

Carpetbaggers are not permitted in our fair city.

And we have exposed the carpetbaggers.

Carpetbaggers such as the mayor's campaign contributors, the mayor's department heads, the mayor's PR firm, and even the mayor himself.

The mayor is now blaming the problems of the city on two more carpetbaggers, Clerk of Courts Johnnie Maier, and Deputy Clerk Shane Jackson.

"They don't like me and they could care less about the city of Massillon" (Frank Cicchinelli, The Independent, February 8, 2011).

Based on Frank Cicchinelli's decision to short the police and fire fighters over a million dollars, and his decision to ignore the dam at Reservoir Park, which was given a first class hazard rating by the Department of Natural Resources, meaning it poses a risk of "probable loss of human life," we wonder just how much Mayor Cicchinelli cares about the city of Massillon.

As the search for the insidious carpetbaggers infiltrating our fair city continues, the crack Massillon Review research staff has exposed one more carpetbagger.

Not only has she infiltrated and infested our fair city, she has infiltrated the home of our eternal leader.

Massillon's First Lady for Life, Joy Cicchinelli.

Joy Cicchinelli isn't originally from Massillon. She is from Altoona, Pennsylvania.

This makes her a carpetbagger.

What nefarious plans is she cooking up against our home town?

Joy Cicchinelli was caught circulating candidate petitions for 4th Ward Council challenger Jackie Carter.

Right under her husband's nose.

Why is she recruiting council members?

Is this some sort of "sneaky ploy to control our city government?"

Or worse.

We bet she even attended church in Altoona, Pennsylvania.

We can only speculate what kind of infidel theology passes for religion in Altoona.

And why did our Mayor for Life choose to wed a carpetbagger?

Were not our own home grown native born Massillonian women good enough for our mayor?

Didn't a native Massillonian woman deserve the chance to be First Lady for Life?

We demand answers. Our entire way of life may be at risk.